It will take me a bit to come to terms with all that has transpired in the recent months from every facet of my life. I am alone I always have been and I always will be. I woke this morning with these words in my consciousness. I have carried the pain story of my biological family in my consciousness and have been a slave to it in practical terms for 48 years. I have taken care of the legalities, civilities, the celebrations, the basics of all therein for every member of my biological family and many others. I have had to step forward in ways I never wanted to or dreamed I would be strong enough to do.

I have been substantially alone in this journey. It began that Way and it ended that Way yesterday. Everyone else swirled around the exterior being free to come and go as they saw fit or could stand and make comments or judgements as they felt the need.

I have been mocked, humiliated, degraded, used and abused continually in this journey without reprieve.

Being of professional designation I am always the one who does the duty and gets the call from Dr’s, Lawyers, courts, Police, Community etc with regards to my family. I am always the one who had to bring myself to the table professionally, financially, emotionally and physically to deal with the tough matters at hand.

I have done it and I am surely proud of that.

I have been completely alone in this part and with great opposition and lack of understanding as I took care of the serious matters of safety and ensuring acceptable standards of living.

And so it is and ever will be. My understood and accepted reality has been reinforced, confirmed and made strikingly clear the last few months. I accept that truth as a practical confirmation of that which in my heart I always knew at the core I was really living.